Dragon Along- The Warriors are hired to defeat a large dragon. Thinking he’d be smaller, they don’t have a plan, so they fail miserably. They each try to make a plan, but each one is so egocentric that nobody can agree on one. They get annoyed with each other and all try to defeat the dragon alone. When Vambre looks like she’s about to be eaten by the dragon, the group uses teamwork techniques to save her.
Pest Control- A villager hires Zange to make a flu relief potion, but due to the tomfoolery going on within the Legendary Warriors headquarters, extra ingredients fall into the mix and release a very annoying gremlin who pops from place to place giving people wedgies, wet willies, noogies and the like. Since they can’t catch him (not even Phil), they ask their friend The Brainsmith for help. He tells them the only way to get rid of him and it involves all four of them putting on stupid outfits and doing a dopey choreographed chant. They refuse to do it until the villagers form a lynch mob.
Always Dignity- There’s a dry spell in peril and the Legendary Warriors are going broke. Zange’s family offers to hire them to do yard work, but they don’t want to lower themselves to that, so they attempt to put on a ridiculous show-offy stage show. It’s awful, especially Phil’s puppet show, “Flog & Molly”. They give up and do the yard work and unearth some giant monster worms which the kingdom pays them to defeat.
Lord Skullbood- The Warriors travel to the neighboring Kotassium kingdom to take care of some common forest pest monsters. Afterwards, Phil gets very hungry and swipes and eats a talking muffin that sounds like Gary Owens. Unfortunately, the muffin was Lord Skullblood who the kingdom worshipped. The very large villagers declare war on the West Rhyboflaven kingdom. The Warriors flee home to practice their desperation moves, but they fear that it won’t be enough to conquer such a big group. Phil, feeling guilty, has Zange bake him a muffin costume so he can pose as Lord Skullblood and stop the war. When he gets back to Kotassium, the villagers laugh hysterically at his terrible costume and poor impression. By the time he got there, it didn’t matter anymore anyway. They realized they were so much better off being able to think freely without the constant orders of Skullblood.
Justifying the Means- The Warriors are hired to fight a giant land squid. While they do defeat it, they do it with their usual general tomfoolery rather than the serious and skillful manner that Vambre demands. The gets very angry with the rest of the group and raises their level of training to abusive levels. When they plead for mercy, she realizes how badly she’s been mistreating them and leaves to find herself. She gets special training from The Wise Dingus, a guru who shows her that effective jackassery is ok.
All You Need Is Brains- Prohias starts dating Koko, a girl who takes up all his time and builds him up so much that starts to think he’s such a genius that he doesn’t need the rest of the Warriors. He and Koko start making unreasonable demands and he leaves the group. By the time he realizes the terrible mistake he’s made, she Warriors have already replaced him. Prohias runs away with the circus, but the Warriors seek him out after the new hire gets annoying.
All material ©2006 Kyle A. Carrozza unless otherwise noted. All rights reserved. You may download images for your viewing pleasure, but don't use them on your site or in print without permission from Kyle A. Carrozza.